Dear David: There was a movie out about forty years ago, maybe longer, about a young woman studying to become a nun. When she has second thoughts and leaves the convent, a statue of the Virgin Mary takes on human form and replaces her while she is out finding herself. When the woman decides to return to the convent, the statue takes its place back in the church. Can you tell me anything about this movie? I may be wrong, but I think one of the suitors in the film may have been a young Roger Moore. I also remember the others nuns wondering what happened to the statue. Can you solve this for me please! – K.B.W., Boston
Dear K.B.W.: That’s the 1959 film “The Miracle,” with Carroll Baker, Moore and Walter Slezak.
Dear Mr. Inman: I am writing to ask you for help about a show I was hooked on back in the 1980s. I thought it was called “Golden Monkey” and it was about an Indiana Jones-type character who flew a plane in the South Pacific before World War II. But I can find no mention of it. Please reply to ease my mind. – K.K., Cincinnati
Dear K.K.: Just call me easy, like Sunday morning.
“Tales of the Gold Monkey” ran on ABC from 1982-83.
The show was set in 1938 and dealt with the adventures of Jake Cutter (Stephen Collins), a former pilot with the Flying Tigers who was now a freelance pilot on the island of Boragora, which is so remote it doesn’t even exist.
Jake was always getting into scrapes with Nazi spies, Nazi saboteurs and just plain Nazis, not to mention Japanese spies, Japanese saboteurs, etc., etc.
Along for the ride were Jake’s mechanic Corky (Jeff MacKay), spy Sarah Stickney White (Caitlin O’Heaney) and Bon Chance Louie (Roddy MacDowall), who owned the Monkey Bar on Boragora.
Dear Incredible Inman: When I was a kid back in the 1950s, my favorite show was “I Married Joan,” which I believe ran on Wednesday nights. I thought the actress who played Joan, Joan Davis, was the funniest woman in the world. Of course, I was four. Can you tell me when the series originally ran and, even more important, the words to the theme song? – E.W., Cincinnati
Dear E.W.: “I Married Joan” ran on NBC from 1952-55, and featured Davis as Joan Stevens, loving but scatterbrained wife of judge Bradley Stevens (Jim Backus). Other cast regulars included Davis’ real-life daughter, Beverly Wills, as Joan’s onscreen sister. And the theme song went like this:
I married Joan,
What a girl
What a whirl
What a life!
I married Joan,
What a mind,
Love is blind,
What a wife!
Giddy and gay
all day she keeps my heart laughin’,
Never know where her brain has flown,
To each his own,
can’t deny that’s why I MARRIED JOAN!
Dear David Inman: A friend and I both have vague recollections of a TV series during the 1980s about a man hitchhiking across America who was also a werewolf during the full moon. My friend remembers there was also a “hunter” who was always on his trail. Are we imagining things or did this series exist? – Jason and Ray, Southern Indiana
Dear J. and R.: You know, for better or worse, some TV shows just bring out the songwriter in me. Sing along – you know the tune.
Come and listen to my story
of a college dope
who got bitten by a werewolf
and became a lycanthrope
He traveled cross the country
with a hunter close behind,
but before he could break free
the show was dumped by Fox
“Werewolf” ran on Fox in 1987. John J. York played the wolf in question, Eric Cord. Eric’s problem was that he was bitten by his college roommate – no jokes, please – and turned in a hairy, hairy beast. Eric then shot his roommate with a silver bullet and set out to find the king of the werewolves, because once the king was killed, Eric wouldn’t be a werewolf any more.
Yes, it’s all about you, isn’t it, Eric?
Anyway, the king of the werewolves was played by Chuck “The Rifleman” Connors, and the bounty hunter chasing Eric was played by Lance LeGault.
Dear Incredible David: I know you don’t usually do song lyrics, but this is kind of TV-related. Whenever I hear the song “Touch Me” by The Doors, the last three notes are the same as the ones in an old TV commercial with the words “stronger than dirt.” Here’s my question – what detergent commercial was that from? (Told you it was TV related!) – T.E., Louisville
Dear T.E.: Ajax laundry detergent. The commercial featured a white knight on horseback who rode around making everything white when he touched it with his magic lance.
Dave: I remember seeing an old b/w sci-fi movie about a big bald giant man who was exposed to radiation near an Air Force Base or something. The scene that always stands out in my mind is when he takes a large syringe needle and throws it down towards a man and it goes right through him. Awesome! What is the name of this? – T., Rochester, NY
Dear T.: That’s “The Invasion of Mr. Clean.”
No, just joshing.
Actually it’s “The Amazing Colossal Man,” from 1957. Glenn Langan played Lt. Col. Glen Manning, who was just minding his own business fighting Communists and stuff when he is exposed to a bomb blast that makes get really big really fast, and ignites his syringe-throwing fury!
Dear David: Back in the late 1970s maybe early 1980s there was a movie based in the South. A family with two children – boy and girl – moved into an old Victorian house. Soon after the ghost of a girl with a French accent started appearing to them both. Apparently before she could “rest” they needed to find her doll. By accident it was found in the old well where the little girl had died. The doll was full of diamonds. Any idea on what the movie’s title is? I’ve checked the Internet and no luck, so perhaps you will have an answer. – R.E., via e-mail
Dear R.E.: The “Internet” has answers for questions like this? It must be stopped at all costs!
In the meantime, we’ll offer that the movie is a made-for-TV film called “Child of Glass,” and it aired in 1978. It starred Anthony Zerbe, Barbara Barrie and Steve Shaw.
Hi: In the 1960s when I was a child there was a program about a talking basset hound. I really enjoyed this program and whenever we get together with friends and start reminiscing I mention this program, but NO ONE can remember ever seeing it. I know that I saw it because I fell in love with basset hounds as a result. Please confirm that such a program aired, even for short time. I am not getting senile — not yet! – Frances, via e-mail
Dear Frances: There, there.
The show did indeed exist, and it was called “The People’s Choice.” It aired on NBC from 1955-58 and in reruns into the early 1960s.
Jackie Cooper played Socrates “Sock” Miller, who was on the city council of New City, California. He had a little romance going with Mandy Peoples (Patricia Breslin), daughter of the town mayor. Eventually they married, but had to keep it secret for sitcom-related reasons. Oh – and Sock had a basset hound named Cleo, whose thoughts were voiced by Mary Jane Croft.